Asking for Help

Okay, I admit it. Generally, I'm horrible when it comes to asking other people for help. The only people I can really ask for help without feeling guilty are my husband and my mom. For everybody else I wait for help to be offered, and even then I have a really hard time accepting. It's not because I have problems giving up control. I just feel guilty about it. In the back of my mind I keep wondering "How much am I inconveniencing this person?"

Tonight Kevin and I have a double date with another pastor and his wife. The pastor's daughters were going to babysit for us. However, about three hours before the date we get a call saying the oldest daughter has a school project she has to work on and will be unable to babysit for us. The younger daughter isn't quite old enough to babysit on her own yet. So Kevin hands me the phone and the church directory and tells me to try to find a new babysitter. I just couldn't bring myself to do it. I sat staring at the list thinking "Who do I doom for the remainder of the day?" Don't get me wrong, I think I could have called around if we were looking for a babysitter a few days from now. But I couldn't bring myself to do it with not even three hours notice and the fact that we'll be gone the remainder of the day. Kevin was a sweetheart (as he very often is) and made the phone calls for me after he was done with his work. I'm sure the babysitter he found didn't think anything of the situation.

I want to get better at asking for help. One of these days I'll get brave enough to take somebody up on their offer to watch Chloe for a half day or a day so I can take some time to myself. I desperately need a haircut. Maybe I can take a baby step by asking somebody to watch her just while I get my hair cut. I know asking for help won't get any easier until I actually start doing it. Maybe sometime soon I can write about my wonderful afternoon I had all to myself and post a picture of my hairstyle!